Archive for Bystander

Confession: I Finally Got Around to Reading “The Chocolate War” by Robert Cormier

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And indeed there will be time

To wonder, “Do I dare?” and, “Do I dare?”

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I’m not a ticker by nature. You know tickers, right, those bird-watchers who have the list in their back pockets, and are all too delighted at each new sighting to check another one off the list. Yellow warbler, good, that’s done.

I worry about those people. I sit up at night, fretting over the shallowness of that experience. Is that all they want, I agonize, just to check it off and be done with it?

I suspect that some readers are the same way. Read it, read it, read it. Done, done, done. What’s next?

Where’s the reflection? When did it become a race?

Better to read one book well, and deeply, than to race through a dozen.

That said, it felt good to finally get around to reading Robert Cormier’s The Chocolate War, the book that rekindles the question, “Do I dare disturb the universe?”

By the way, you know where that quote’s from, right? Only one of the greatest poems ever.

I thought The Chocolate War was brilliant, expertly written, full of youthful rebellion, combativeness, anger, sorrow, energy, brutality — and still timely today. A stunner, frankly. There are not many times when I feel I could have written someone else’s book, and it would be misguided and presumptuous for me to say that here, but I did feel a kinship with Cormier. I understood him down to my bones, recognized his choices, knew exactly what he was trying to achieve.

Cormier’s book is darkly beautiful, the characters vividly drawn, sharp and jagged. There’s the cold manipulation of Archie Costello, the puppet-master. Jerry’s confusion and inner conflict, his unresolved emotions, the way events took on a life of their own beyond any decision or intentionality. And all that catholic school stuff, yes, I remembered that,  too. The 70s were my era, and the tone of this book rang clear and true. Cormier got it all right. The novel’s themes are closely connected to my own book, Bystander, but Cormier goes deeper, darker, older. If Bystander is right for middle school — a somewhat gentle introduction to bullying, a story that peers over the precipice but never makes that leap into the void — then The Chocolate War goes a step or two beyond, grades 8/9-up. It takes you into the black. Where I stopped short, by design, Cormier plunges bravely onward.

Stop it, stop it. But nobody heard. His voice was lost in the thunder of screaming voices, voices calling for the kill . . . kill him, kill him. Goober watched helplessly as Jerry finally sank to the stage, bloody, opened mouth, sucking for air, eyes unfocused, flesh swollen. His body was poised for a moment like some wounded animal and then he collapsed like a hunk of meat cut loose from a butcher’s hook.

On a different note, in my upcoming book, Before You Go, the main character, Jude, is a runner. I had to think about that, and describe his running, here and there, nothing much. A metaphor, for sure, alluding to deeper themes, but also something as concrete and specific as sneakers on the sidewalk.

Well, here’s a paragraph from The Chocolate War. A quick description of a minor character, Goober, who likes to run. Want to read a great passage?

The Goober was beautiful when he ran. His long arms and legs moved flowingly and flawlessly, his body floating as if his feet weren’t touching the ground. When he ran, he forgot about his acne and his awkwardness and the shyness that paralyzed him when a girl looked his way. Even his thoughts became sharper, and things were simple and uncomplicated — he could solve math problems when he ran or memorize football play patterns. Often he rose early in the morning, before anyone else, and poured himself liquid through the sunrise streets, and everything seemed beautiful, everything in its proper orbit, nothing impossible, the entire world attainable.

All I can add to that is, wow. Just slack-jawed wow. Poured himself liquid through the sunrise streets. Liquid! The portrait of Goober  goes on for another remarkable paragraph, where Cormier turns the phrase, “The neighbors would see him waterfalling down High Street . . .”

Waterfalling! The noun as verb, the image startling and yet crystal clear, natural not forced. Waterfalling down High Street.

Run, Goober, run. See Goober run. Liquid, waterfalling.

Damn. That’s great writing.

ADDENDUM:

A librarian friend chimed in with this comment, via email:

Saw on your blog that you finally read The Chocolate War.  Amazing book, huh?  It gets banned EACH AND EVERY year, as you can probably imagine, for being – and I quote from some of the language in the bans and challenges – “pornographic,” for foul language, for its “portrayal of violence and degradation of schools and teachers,” for its “blasphemy” and because it is “ humanistic and destructive of religious and moral beliefs and of national spirit.”  One challenge, in a Georgia high school, cited “ I don’t see anything educational about that book.  If they ever send a book like that home with one of my daughters again I will personally burn it and throw the ashes on the principal’s desk.”  And my favorite, from someone who wanted to ban it because the ending was…get this…too pessimistic.

A book like that, you just HAVE to read.

“Bad Decisions Make Good Stories.”

I came across this wall photo on the web. I wasn’t too crazy about it, frankly, didn’t strike me as hysterical, but number 10 got my attention:

Bad decisions make good stories.

(Click on the image if you wish to make it larger. You know that, right?)

I think that five-word sentence serves as an excellent piece of advice to writers. Just as we don’t want to read about perfect people who always do the right thing, and think the correct thoughts, there is nothing duller than a character who never makes a mistake.

It’s the imperfections that make us human. The wrong turns that take us to unexpected places.

I recently received an email from a middle school teacher who complimented me on Bystander. However, she wondered about the scene late in the book when Eric snuck into Griffin’s house. She wasn’t comfortable with it, didn’t feel that Eric was modeling the appropriate behavior, sending the right message. My answer was simple. First, I reminded her, respectfully, that I wrote a story, not a thesis, and that I never intended for Eric to portray “all the correct responses” to bullying. And secondly, that I had no desire to write about a character who never experienced a lapse of judgment. More importantly, as a writer I understood and recognized Eric’s motivation — that part made sense to me, the urge for revenge, why he wanted to take back what was stolen from him — even if it wasn’t the “right” thing to do.

The lapse made him more human.

Again:

Bad decisions make good stories.

Just to be clear: I also dislike it when character do incredibly stupid things for seemingly no reason, or when they act in ways that are inconsistent with their character. The “bad decision” should (or must) fit in with the logic of the character as written.

Or so I tell myself.

One Book, One School: My Visit to John Winthrop Middle School

Trying something new today — typing on my iPad from a hotel in Newberry, South Carolina, about my visit a few weeks back to Deep River, Connecticut.

First, an article that gives you all the info you need, plus some snaps. Media specialist Cara Rothman spearheaded the plan, enlisted the support from fellow teachers and administrators, and, amazingly, about nine months after she first emailed me . . . there I stood, meeting with the students of John Winthrop.

I love the “one school, one book” concept. It creates a true unity of purpose among the educators, and a common experience for students. It doesn’t have to be my book; there are so many great books out there. But I do think it brings a school together in a spirit of cooperation, everybody pulling on that same oar.

Thank you, Cara!

Really nice, carpeted library — the perfect setting. Nice chairs, too. At John Winthrop, even the halls were carpeted. Very quiet.

Cara used the book to teach and reinforce vocabulary and key concept

These awesome girls hung around to comment and ask questions after one session — and somebody grabbed a camera. I love it when a book seems to appeal to both male and female readers.

Oh, dear. An unfortunate angle.

Fan Mail Wednesday #128 (student poem)

I recently received a letter from a student named Ellen. She included two powerful writing samples along with this note:



Mr. Preller,
My school is reading the bystander for a unit. Before starting it I remember laughing and thinking to myself that It was going to be dumb but I read it and I loved every single page. I really related to the character of Mary, as I have been in situations almost exactly like what she was in and your book portrayed the emotions and middle school social life exactly. One of the career choices I have been looking into is writing like you. I have enclosed a poem I write about being a bystander and a writing piece about what happened before your book. I understand that you are busy but If you have the time reading them and telling me what you think would mean the world to me. That brings me to my next question. Will they be making a movie of the Bystander? I would love to audition. If you could tell me when they are and what I need to do that would mean a lot to me.

Thank you so much and I just wanted to let you know how much I love your writting,

Here’s the poem, “The Bystander,” by Ellen. You’ll find my reply below:

The Bystander

I see you everyday and I still don’t know your name.

I see them tease and taunt you and your face blush ruby with shame.

I see the balls they throw and the vile things they slur.

I see you walking through the halls, your world in a vast abyss of pitch-black blur.

I see you sit alone everyday, tears brimming in your eyes.

I see them snicker and laugh at you, and then you run to the bathroom, to cry.

I hear them talk behind your back, like daggers penetrating your skin.

You try to fight the raging river but you know that they’ll always win.

I see your valiant attempts to carry your head high.

I see right through the hard efforts and I know that it’s all a lie.

I see you walk into school everyday, praying that it won’t get worse.

Only you have to bear the cross that you’re alone; I’ve never felt that curse.

You don’t deserve to be treated like this, but there’s nothing I can do.

I see you everyday and I know you want to leave but your stuck here like glue.

It’s like a scarlet letter, everybody knows.

You try to block out the screaming but the haunting yells only grow.

I hear them whisper and I know that it must hurt.

I see them walk all over you and treat you like you’re dirt.

I see your empty desk and I don’t know where you are.

I know that everything was too much and what they did will always leave a scar.

I’m almost happy that you’re gone so that you don’t have to face this prison cell.

I know it’s too late but I’m sorry that I helped make those years a living hell.

I did as much as my friends; sitting is as good as calling names.

I would do anything, ANYTHING, to take it back; to throw those years into a roaring and raging flame.

I hope the wounds will heal on your soul; bruised and broken

I’m still plagued with images of you, every night; I hope that’s enough of a token.

There’s nothing I can do now, I’m an accomplice to an unspeakable crime.

I almost helped to reap your lovely soul far before it’s time.

You’re gone to somewhere else and I can’t really help you.

You made it through this crisis and you’ll go somewhere new.

I don’t think they know what they did. They only saw what they wanted and I guess I did to.

I only saw the demon that the angels branded with a their eternal tattoo.

It took me a long time but now I know the truth; the demons were the them and the angel was you.

I replied:
Dear Ellen,
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Thanks again for your incredible letter. As I briefly told you before, right after receiving your letter, I needed some time to think about your poem before writing back in any detail. Your poem blew me away — so tough, and deeply felt, and powerful. It made me feel sad and a little bit worried about you. I don’t want you to be too hard on yourself, or others.
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Before we get to that, I’d like to point out that, to me, the two secret stars of the book are the seemingly minor characters of Cody and Mary. Both of them undergo the greatest change. Griffin, in the role of bully, stays about the same; and Eric, as witness, mostly manages to get through it all. But Mary, well, she’s brave and terrific. She’s made mistakes in the past, hurt people, but later shows the courage to stand by her own convictions. That brave line, “I’m so tired of what other people think” — and so Mary begins to think for herself. Cody has a similar transformation toward the end, when he goes against Griffin and offers to help fix Eric’s bike. Cody decides for himself what is right and what is wrong, and acts accordingly.
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No plans for a movie that I know of. I get asked that question all the time. And I mean: All. The. Time. Right now, I’m pretty thrilled with the play.
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About your poem. The writing is so well done, handled with such immediacy and grace. The rhymes are never clunky or cumbersome, never get in the way of what you want to say. But I think, perhaps, you are a little too tough on the bystanders. Yes, I think most of us can reflect back on times past, regret our actions, our inactions, our failures. We can’t help but feel our share of responsibility for what happens to the people in our lives. But we’re not in control, and we don’t live those lives, and we don’t make those decisions. We can only know what we know. We can’t always recognize how it feels for someone else — it could be that we lack empathy, or compassion, or maybe our lives are too busy, too full, for us to look around and truly see.
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We are flawed, imperfect beings. That’s the nature of being human.
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So while the bystanders might share some responsibility — and I absolutely believe “they” do — they can never be solely to blame. We can only do the best we can, and somehow we’ve got to accept those failings, learn from them, and try to become better people moving forward.
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I had a friend who committed suicide, long ago. A boy named Chris. He was a year younger than me, we were never particularly close. I went away to college, and a few months later, he was gone. And in my head and in my heart there will always, always be the thought, “If only.”
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If only I did this. If only I did that. Could have, should have, would have.
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I don’t know the answers to these questions, Ellen. But I do believe in asking the questions, in learning the questions — and how that might even more important than knowing the answers. Just learning the right questions.
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I appreciate what you wrote. It made me think, and helped me remember.
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Thank you.
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I’m glad you read my “dumb” book.
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JP

Reminder: The Concrete Temple Theatre performs BYSTANDER this Friday, 11/4, in Hudson, NY

Just a reminder for those of you in the area . . .

Special thanks to the Hudson City School District Arts & Humanities Fund and the Berkshire Taconic Community Foundation for making this debut performance possible. I’m honored, surprised, and eager to see it — and wondering where this endeavor might take us before we’re through. Maybe to a school near you?