You should know that children’s book impresarios Susan Brandes and Beth Vetare-Civitello have put together another spectacular lineup of authors and illustrators for this year’s (13th annual?) Children’s Book Festival.
With more than 50 authors/illustrators on hand, the list is too excruciatingly long to include everyone. So I’ll only name my favorites:
JAMES PRELLER!
Well, it looks like we’ve run out of time. Sunnyside is a gorgeous location, with historic buildings nestled in beside the mighty Hudson . . .
What’s that? Hold on. I just got a text . . .
Tony Abbott: WTF??!!
Anyway, as I was saying . . .
Eric Velasquez: Punk!
Charise Mericle Harper: When I see you there, I will throw a CUPCAKE in your face!
Jean Craighead George: Die, die, die!
Rebecca Stead: How would you like to have a Newbery Medal shoved up your . . .
Whoa, whoa, people, CALM DOWN! Obviously, some of these “artists” — and I’m using the term loosely — have ego issues. Touchy, touchy. Seriously, I don’t even know these people. And I don’t want to know them! But, okay, here’s a few other names before I get into any more trouble (but believe me, I’m pretty confident I can handle Jean Craighead George in a tussle, if it’s a fair fight and she doesn’t carry a crude knife fashioned out of tree bark and a plastic spork; and as far as Ms. Stead’s “offer,” that may be as close as I’ll ever get):
Nora Raleigh Baskin * Judy Blundell * Katie Davis * Jules Feiffer * Susan Jeffers * Peter Lerangis * Gail Carson Levine * Wendy Mass * Wendell Minor * Jerry Pinkney * Peter Sis * Hudson Talbott * Ed Young * James Howe * Michael Rex * Nick Bruel * Bruce Degan * Diane Goode * and many, many more, including JAMES FREAKING PRELLER!
I’m also glad to see that my friend, Matthew McElligott, will be attending this year. His new book, Even Monsters Need Haircuts, looks pretty great.
Maybe I’ll offer him a ride . . . if he pays for gas.
And tolls.
Show time: 12:00 – 4:30.
Oh, yeah, one more thing. I’ll do something that these other children’s authors and illustrators are afraid to do. That’s right: I am personally guaranteeing a beautiful day. Blue skies, warm sun, good times. Trust me on this, people. It’s my personal promise to you.
This year, I mean it.
So come on out and bring lots of money bring the kids!
Click here for full details, directions, etc.
What? You didn’t get MY text?
I’ll see YOU at storytime, Preller! But not if I see you first.
Katie, no disrespect, but I’m more worried about Jean Craighead George. I hear she’s got a hell of a left hook.