There’s a kid somewhere in America named Daniel Van Ness. I don’t know him from a hole in the head. But on November 7th, Daniel started a very important petition:
Please have the 20th Century Fox company make a new movie called ‘The Case of Hermie the Missing Hamster: A Jigsaw Jones Mystery’ starring Bryan Suchey as Jigsaw Jones, Sierra Jade Gerban as Mila Yeh, Ethan Scheid as Ralphie Jordan, Yara Shahidi as Danika Starling, Charlene Geisler as Lucy Hiller, Michael May as Joey Pignattano, Alan Aisenberg as Charlie “Bigs” Maloney, Ingrid Rubio as Miss Gleason, Jeff Daniels as Mr. Copabianco, Noah Ryan Scott as Jaspar “Stringbean” Noonan, Rachael Harris as Mrs. Jones, Steve Zahn as Mr. Jones, Steve Martin as Principal Rogers, Devon Tucker as Billy, 1 of Jigsaw’s older brothers, Zachary Gordon as Daniel, another 1 of Jigsaw’s older brothers, Robert Capron as Nick, another 1 of Jigsaw’s older brothers, Oliver (puppy dog actor) as Rags, Jigsaw’s puppy dog, Parris Mosteller as Bobby Solofsky, Preston Bailey as Timothy “Wingnut” O’brien, Selena Gomez as Hillary, Jigsaw’s older sister, Dakota Fanning as Kimmy Lewis and Elle Fanning as Kayla Lewis.
Daniel Van Ness, if you are out there, I just want to say . . . THANK YOU FOR BEING THE COOLEST KID ON THE PLANET! Seriously, nice job. I appreciate it.
People, we must get behind this. Daniel’s expressed goal is a modest 18 signatures. I signed it the other day, so now Daniel has 5. So, um, top of my head, that means he only needs 13 more signatures. One of them should be YOURS!
Come on, folks, click the link, sign the petition, spread the word, and make this brilliant young man’s dream come true!
By the way, I love Daniel’s cast suggestions:
And Steve Martin as PRINCIPAL ROGERS:
Daniel did not suggest a director, but the choice is obvious:
No one else can be trusted. The job must go to Martin Scorsese!
UPDATE, 11/14, 8:27 AM: Currently at 19 signatures. Thanks, everybody. I’d type more but I think I should sit by the phone. I’m expecting a call from Hollywood!