James Preller's Blog

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New Year’s Eve.

I’ve decided that my guiding word for the next year is balance. 

On a physical level, I’ve reached the age where balance has become incredibly important. I don’t want to fall and go boom. Balance is a skill that can be developed, nurtured, cultivated. There are a lot of simple exercises I can do to improve my balance. And it’s all about hope, I think, a vision for the future. For health and wellness and happiness. So, yeah, I’m standing on one foot while I brush my teeth.  And on particularly daring mornings . . . I’m closing my eyes. 

The other aspect of the word, where different elements of our lives are somehow in correct proportion, is a much more imposing goal.

A balanced life. 

I know a lot of people, myself included, who need regular exercise in order to feel settled. That sense of, ah, I’m good. And onto the next thing. It’s the body-mind connection, how our mental & spiritual health thrives when we are taking care of our physical self. Balance is a circle; everything connects and affects.

Lately I think of writing in that way, too. The lifelong struggle. I want to writer better. I know that I’ve held back, all these years, out of some fear or personal shortcoming. A very deep sense of not being good enough. It’s the devil in my ear, I know. 

Maybe this year I can do better with that. Work harder, fail better, worry less. Because when my writing life is moving, my life feels whole, balanced, a circle. I need to take care of this for the remainder of my days. My new year’s promise to myself. 

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Here’s some advice from novelist Lily King, words I found today on the last page of the book, Writers & Lovers:  

“I knew that I felt better after I had written each day. That’s all I knew. What you need to be true to, what you need to abide, is what you hear inside you, what wants to come out. 

Listen to that. It has a story to tell.”